Noah's life long struggle to breathe is coming to an end

The long awaited appointment with the nose, ear, throat specialist for Noah came today. I have been telling Noah's Dr. since birth, "This kid can't breathe." Noah stayed in my room for maybe 3 days after he was born. He was the snortiest, loudest breathing, snoring baby boy. His Dr. has always believed that is was due to his constant allergies, which the kid definately has. He is unrecognizable after meeting up with hay, stray cats, or Jace's goats. But I have always known it was more than just allergies. So moms- let this be a lesson to you. After looking at Noah for about 30 seconds today, the specialist was scheduling him for a tonsilectomy. I think our gut instincts about our children are right about 99% of the time. Noah has never complained that he can't breathe or that is nose is constantly stuffed and itchy, it's all he's ever known. The rest of us on the other hand - want to slap him. I should have taken him in years ago for the sake of my sanity when trying to nap by him and for the sake of his poor sister who has shared a bed with him since he was 18 months old. He holds his breath when trying to go to sleep and then when he does finally go to sleep...he snores. The entire night. So poor Noah. But YEA for us!

The appointment today by the way was a diasaster. What was I thinking taking both my boys at nap time and then what turned into be lunch time? The Dr. kept us waiting almost an hour. I thought the nurses were going to have to turn me into CPS. Ezra was eating things out of the trash can and screaming when ever Noah got within 3 feet of him(the room, by the way, was 5 feet wide). Noah was riding the stool on wheels back and forth (you know the one that every Dr's office should hide when children are in the room?) and looking for snacks in every cabinet. I promised the office staff that I would not be scheduling his pre-op or post-op appointment during nap/lunch time again. They smiled kindly like they understood and bid us all farewell.

I drove as fast as I could to the nearest eating establishment - Samari Sam's- for my rice eating Noah. We had just sat down with the food, when who should walk in? You guessed it. Two of the nurses who had just bid us farewell. I looked up and tried to smile. I told them, "I am so sorry you have to now spend your lunch hour with us. Would you all just sit across the restaurant over there, so you won't have to listen to him (refering to Ezra) scream all thru your lunch?" They laughed politely. And not kidding, 5 minutes later, Noah proceeded to spill a newly filled orange soda all over the table, Ezra, and the floor. About 3 employees appeared from the back with mops, buckets, a "Caution Wet Floor" sign, and towels. As I walked wet napkins to the trash, I passed the nurses and one of them said to me, "It's just not your day. Tomorrow will be better. And we have seen way worse children if that makes you feel better." No, it didn't make me feel better and no, I didn't tell that tomorrow won't be any better either. Ezra will scream on and off ALL day. Noah will find something not intended to be ridden and ride it into a wall or sibling. And I'm sure I'll find something else to interrupt Ezra's nap and delay an all important meal time. And I will probably yell at some point. And I will probably get another headache around 6pm. But I will love being those 2 rowdy boy's mother (Macy's too) and I will try to remember that these are the best days of my life. My children are my heart and right now I am their world. I wouldn't trade that for anything...including a quiet lunch out where the beverage stays standing and no one has to place "Caution" signs around my table. My time's a comin'.

And Just Like That.....My Life is Back

It's officially over. We are moved. The house deal closed without a hitch. We are getting more settled everyday in our new house. We have "hung out our sign." The Baum's are back in business.
The highlight of the stressful moving day is the reason for this awful picture being included in this post. The crutches are GONE! It couldn't have happened on a better day. Jace is now in a walking cast and is still gimping about but SO much more in the ball game. He couldn't move heavy furniture, so we hired movers this time (best decision ever). The best part is he can now carry his own plate to the sink and he can haul little children around again. SO glad you're back, Babe! Oh, how we missed you!Our best substitute plumber/dad/handyman/entertainer/mover is gone. Taft left to California the morning after the big move. Always a sad day at the Baums'. My children are having Nintendo DS withdrawls and Jace wonders around like a lost puppy dog. These shoes are all he left with us. Taft- just know Noah's bed is always open and your seat beside Jace in the plumbing truck will be kept warm for you. We owe you big time. Come back soon!These pictures are for my sister Addie only. She hasn't been sleeping at night wondering where in the world the Baums now lay their heads. Addie- this is my new kitchen and Macy's sweet bedroom with her private balconey ("for the last time Mom, it's a porch"). I'll spare you all the entire house picture tour but as you can see, it is a really nice house. We feel so blessed that is worked out for us. Big thanks to Melissa and Ira. We love our new home.

Are you wondering why this picture is included? Well, after only 2 days of living on this tile, I came to the conclusion that I hate my wood floor in my old house. I knew it wasn't my favorite and was a lot of work (ok, consumed my life kind of work) but I had no idea. Never again will I install 2,500 sq. feet of really dark wood floor. Will someone please remind me of all these lessons I've learned next time around?

OK, Ezra and the dogreally love each other. Could spend all day in this position. OK, maybe just Ezra could.

The dog is kind enough to share her food with Ezra. All day. Every day.

This is the response I get when I knock the dog food out of his hand and swipe it out of his mouth. It is not a quick recovery either. The kid can't help himself, he loves the dog food. I told Jace it is too bad that the dog food isn't good for his health because that would be the best way to feed a 17 month old - leave a bowl on the porch and let the kid help himself all day long.

Daisy the cow's new home (and our one remaining chicken). We are glad she could join us. The 1st time Ezra woke up from his nap at the rental and looked out his bedroom window, he questioned me, "Moo? Moo?" I had to tell him the cow would be residing on the side of this house and not in front of his bedroom window anymore. Kirsten said we had better get that cow on some pasture before someone calls CPS for animals. I guess she thinks the pen is too small. She's probably right.
And this is what it all came down to. This is what I got out of the deal.....a packet of papers and a big, fat check. Was it worth it? I still can't say. But I'm relieved to be breathing deep again, thrilled to be taking naps with Noah again, happy to be going back to aeorbics, and loving knowing where the TV remote/hammer/Macy's socks/ect. are again. Just so glad it's all over. Oh, wait. That's right. We've just begun....again.

Future Beauty School Drop Out (oh, I mean Graduate)

Beet,

You are the one on right. Macy's on the left. And the correct spelling would be "I want to be a salon." You have made quite an impression on her 6 year old mind. She needs to make an appointment with you for a nail painting and hair straightening experience. She has whipped all the required reading necessary for this reward. She is still sure that no one at school will recognize her with her nails painted and hair straightened, including and especially her bus driver. Hopefully she makes it home ok. Thank you for your constant inspirational example.

Love,

Lindsay

P.S. I meant nothing by the title of this blog, really. ;)

A Bad Omen

During the last 4 months of construction of the most recent house and after the sale of our Bellybutton house, we rented an old house in Snowflake across from Pioneer Park. The house had no a/c, no working windows, and 1 ceiling fan for pregnant Lindsay. Not a good combo. It should have been a happy day when we had to move out and into our brand new home.....but I don't remember it that way. I remember Jace taking all of his strong, English speaking employees with him to another plumbing project and leaving me with 140 lb. Sergio Medina to finish moving out, cleaning the house, repairs, raking hay, shoveling poop, ect. Medina is a somewhat of a legend at White Mountain Plumbing. I would bet that his name comes up at least once a day. He was 40, thought he was every women's dream come true and Jace's father ("Yace, that not the right way"). He is gone back to his homeland (Livin' la Vida Loca forever) but that day he was my "helper" (or so Jace said). It was about the time the property manager got there that I noticed that I didn't have my wedding ring on. I searched my pockets, the house and the poop/hay pile. I was so mad at Jace for leaving me with Sergio all day to clean up his "farm" that I decided I didn't care if I lost the sticking thing. To make a long story a little shorter, Jace thought Sergio swiped it and then lo and behold it appeared in the dryer a week later.?!

Well, today I had the opportunity of spending the day with another illegal alien (her name is Sandra and I love her and all Mexicans) cleaning the empty house. It went well. We worked until 3pm. I had to go to a Relief Society activity. It was there that I looked down and what do you know? The ring is still on but the diamond is GONE. And I just got to say....this cleaning day didn't bring on hard feeling towards Jace like the previous one but I still don't think I'm going to comb the house for the diamond tomorrow. I'm going with: it's a bad omen. I told Jace it's a sign...he should stop moving me around if he wants his marriage to stay intact. I think I'll take the ring to a jeweler and have them remove the empty prongs and wear just the band. It will be hip. And I figure one day in my wealthy future, I'll run across a beautiful piece of jewelery, and remind Jace- "You owe me one".



This is what happens on cleaning day when you load all 3 kids in the car to go and you're not really ready to go and the oldest child finds the digital camera.

Yes, that is dried ice cream on his seat and dried boogers under his nose. We have been living in the car lately.
I told you Noah can't help sqeezing little people's hands. Ezra is such a good sport (as long as the blue blanket is in sight or reach).
I think she has a bright future in the photography field. What do you think?

2720 Bourden Ranch Rd.

My new address! We are just moving right down the road. Same ward. Same school. We get to rent Ira and Melissa Parry's brand new spec home. We couldn't be more thrilled with our future residence. The Baums will not be homeless after all. Come and visit us but please don't mail us a letter to this address, as Taylor still does not provide mail delivery to your home. I'm nominating myself has head chairman for the "not a fan of PO Boxes" committee. It will happen one day.....just like the "coming for 3 years now" Wal-mart. I wait with baited breath. I have to pack. I'm out.

The Panic is Starting to Set In!

And the new address will be......? Come on, you know we Baums don't roll like that. We like to keep it suspensful until the very end. With the closing date 7 days away and not one box packed, we still have no permanment residence figured out yet. I have done this enough times now that I know it will all work out. I still can't believe that I won't be coming home to this house next week. We spent countless hours of blood, sweat, and tears looking for land, designing house plans (way to go Jessica!), building the house, moving in, landscaping, decorating, ect. And did I mention I was pregnant the duration of the construction phase? Never again.

This was the house we brought Ezra home to 8 weeks after we moved in. He moved into his bright, white, front bedroom that was designated "the nursing baby room and then the guest room when nursing baby gets shipped upstairs." The house where he learned to crawl and then finally walk.

This is the house Macy learned to ride a bike without training wheels, this is the place she rode the bus home to with Alvie the busdriver on her 1st day of kindergarten, and where she played countless hours of Rapanzel off her 2 story balcony.

This is the house Noah befriended the hand-me-down weiner dog, that still goes by "girl", "riff-raff", "hot dog", and "you DA_ _ dog." The house where he slept by his sister every night only because he loves her so much (and because one of Jace's employees/relative needed to use Noah's bed).

This was the house of countless Baum and Seaman family parties, 2 funeral luncheons, 1 baby blessing brunch, 1 memorable Thanksgiving, 2 Christmas mornings, 1 baby shower for baby Liv, approx. 8 birthday celebrations, and many unannounced (to Lindsay, the cook) dinner parties with friends.

This was not only our home but a home for our favorite roommates as well. Josh and Camryn moved in last May to our apartment above the garage. Baby Liv joined them last September. Camryn has not only been a polite tenant but a great friend, babysitter, and my personal consultant for decorating, cooking, parenting, ect. I will truly miss my roommates when they are no longer a flight of stairs away. I'm sure baby Liv will miss Noah squeezing her hands at every encounter and I will miss no longer have 2 fridges/pantries to pick from.

Are we attached to this structure that has sheltered us for the past 18 months? Maybe a little. But we are getting the opportunty to start again, learn from the lessons we've learned here, see the world from another angle (and street), and cherish the memories we've collected here. And seriously......you can only live at the end of a long dirt road for so long.

Here Comes the Sun....maybe?

Alright, as you probably already heard the Seaman family spring break rocked. Big thanks to Mike and Kim. The resort was amazing -we definately should have requested a hanicapped accessible room for Jace's crutching self but still amazing. The 1st morning we woke up Macy was dying to call Grandma Mikey. She just had to tell her that "the couch turns into a bed when you take the cushions off and if the other cousins don't know...we GOT to tell them." My Mom thought that was pretty good. I told my kids they were going to grow fins and mermaid tails - we couldn't get them out of the pool. And of course everyone except Lindsay and Ezra got a beautiful tan. My freckles are multiplying with every bright red sunburn. Great company, fun shopping and good eating.

The weather was soooo nice too. It was a cruel thing though.....when we pulled into town Sunday night the wind was blowing 80 mph (can you believe the wind was blowing in Taylor?) and we had to light a fire and put children in footed pajamas. I have sent Macy to school this week in capris and a light jacket, so we are making progress. This is the only time of the year that I question why in the world I live here. Then summer comes and all is as it should be. I can't wait for flip flops, popsicles, sprinklers, shorts, vacations, parades, and nights spent outside with my family. So just like everything else in life....this (season) too shall pass.

"No winter lasts forever; no spring skips its turn." - Hal Borland

Dinner with the masses (I was rockin' my new hat from Blossom. Gals, we got to give to up for Blossom. Am I right? Way to go Jody! If you have not been introduced - you got to go. It almost makes me as happy as Target).

Hope Jess and Jordy don't mind me posting the cute picture.

Noah and Zane....didn't know what to do if other was

absent. One would just basically sit sidelines

until the other showed up at the pool...then the

wrestling match/swimming race could begin.

Best buds.

The goggles weren't purchased until the last day, not
until the whites of this mermaid's eyes were pure red.
No floaties this year! She was one brave swimmer.

I think I'm ready to talk about it.

With heavy heart I post my sad story of one bored father and his two innocent victims, my sons. One week ago today, I went to my usual Relief Society presidency meeting and left Jace in charge of supervising and bathing all of his children. I know he is crippled right now but I thought for sure he could handle it, seeing as how Macy usually ends up doing all the supervising of her brothers and father. What I came home to, my brain just could not comprehend or compute. Jace's hair - gone. Noah's beautiful hair - a lot shorter than when I left. Ezra's hair - completely gone. My heart and stomach were sick. My tears and tantrum followed soon after.

Jace has done this before to Noah when he was 18 months old. I cried for 3 days. Noah was born with a taupe of beautiful, thick, black hair. It was devastating then and devastating now. But not near as devastating as looking at my Ezra's bald head. I know Noah's will grow back - Fast. Ezra on the other hand has always had hair but it has been fine, straight, thin hair. It was never much to look at, I thought, until I saw him without it. Boy, I have been missing it. I have decided that there is a reason Heavenly Father has blessed all my children with a head of hair at birth and beyond.....none of them have been blessed with small round heads.

For the 1st couple days after I was threatening to shave my head too, so Ezra and I could hide at home until it grew back. I also had a hard time looking at my poor boy. I would find myself talking to his chest. Crazy? Yea. Time to fill that prescription of Zoloft that's been sitting in my junk drawer? Maybe. But maybe I have some sort of insecurity about hair. My hair and the hair of my offspring. As 1 of 6 girls, I was "blessed," "cursed," whatever with curly, kinky, frizzy, flat, whatever hair. I watched my sisters get their straight, nice hair cut and wondered why I never got a hair cut. FYI: My 1st hair cut was at age 8 and only because my Mother accidentally vacuumed up my hair while I was attempting a head stand. My hair just didn't grow. I would see other girls on the school bus at the end of the day with pony tails still nicely in place and wonder what in the world was wrong with mine. Most of my hair would be no longer nicely in place. I'm still coming to terms with my hair at the age of 26. I try carefully to watch what I say about my hair in front of my Macy. She has inherited my hair or my "curse." Her hair is adorable and I hope that she comes to terms with it sooner in life than what I did. But as I mentioned on my blog before, she already wishes for, talks about, and notices everyone else's "princess" hair. Oh, my heart goes out to the girl.

As for my Ezra, his new du is growing on me. I'm able to look at his head now when we meet and speak. As for my Jace, I'm speaking to him now too. The hair clippers were removed from the house and disposed of. Jace no longer has rights to cut, shave, comb, trim, ect. any hair in the Baum household. He never did have those rights. You have to give birth to earn those rights. The Moral?.....Life will go on. Ezra's hair will grow back. I will have a good hair day this week. Jace will probably make another irrational decision this week (his words, not mine) and I will forgive him, love him, and move on......again.....but not until I remind him of how Ezra's 1st hair cut broke my heart.