Here we have Lorenzo Hill Hatch. My Great, Great, Great Grandpa on my Mom's side. What? He's your grandpa too? GET OUT. Grandpa Hatch had 4 wives in his lifetime. 3 of them at the same time. They would bear him 24 children (the reason why he is your grandpa too). He and his 3rd wife, Alice Hansen, helped found a settlement in Arizona that would later be called Taylor. Grandma Alice hated the wind and wrote about how hard water was to locate. Grandma Alice was a saint. Her husband had 2 other families to care for in Utah and Idaho. Therefore, making it difficult to spend time with Alice and the kids. He would occasionally get back down to Arizona to visit and feed the family.
Not cool.
Jace, lesson #1 is this: The days of polygamy are gone and so should the days of long distance marriage and child rearing be as well. I'm going to need to see you more than occasionally. Please don't find a Utah family (or Idaho family for that matter). We are going to need all of you. TO OURSELVES. Thank you.
And one more thing, remember how I was yelling into my cell phone this evening because I couldn't the @#%$^# fire to start. Well, I guess after 38 kindling sticks, a stack of paper, and 45 minutes with a blow torch. Twice. Something caught fire. That's right. I see flames where flames have refused to be all day:
I admit. I'm no Alice. It's a lot like living with the hanicapped, pioneer cousin that had to be pulled in the hand cart the whole way, when living with me. And I apologize. For the cursing AND acting like a handicapped cousin. I love you.
For those of you who don't know, the fine print reads: I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of latter Saints, or a Mormon. Mormons no longer practice polygamy. Jace and Lindsay Baum practice complete fidelity. We are not looking for substitute mates. I completely love and honor all my ancestors. My 3rd child is named after Lorenzo and Alice's son, Ezra Taft Hatch. My sarcasm is meant to imply that I miss my husband and I'm not very good at being a single mother of 3. capisce?
12 comments:
Ha! That post made me laugh. You are so funny.
Sorry you are having to start fires alone. I'd be in the handicapped wagon right along with you.
Your my VT too? GET OUT. And another reason I'm bummed your moving. 2 birds in one stone is always a good thing, right??
You're hilarious Lindsay. Whenever Alex goes out of town for usually no more than 3 or 4 day, I feel emotionally and physically exhaused. I can only imagine how you feel adding moving to that. You're awesome and I bet u'd be the pioneer keeping the rest of us going!
Love your posts. They always make me laugh! Thanks!
I hate being alone and starting fires too!
I thought you said you couldn't start them? Looks like you can...
Thank goodness no more polygamy. What a lonely thing that must have been. It sounds like you are stressed. Me, too. I'm taking one day at a time. I just got to get through this week. I guess you've got a couple of weeks to get through. ;) Is Jace coming home this weekend?
If you need my husband you can borrow him, but only for chores, HEHE. Seriously though, if you need help with ANYTHING you need to call us!!
You are so funny. I love it. I can't even imagine how you are doing it? When are you moving? Is it moving up by the day because you miss him?
cute post. I was wondering where Ezra came from. I have an old relative with the same name.... Ezra taft...hmmm Pres benson...you think they were related? I think we are old cousins somewhere along the line.
Thanks for being such a good blogger! I can relate with your post. Doug has been gone every week for 4 or 5 days at a time 2 months and and atleast 2 more months to go. I feel myself going slowly insane! I try not to complain to family and friends because they have their own stuff to worry about and they have no idea what I'm going thru. I now have someone that knows. I agree whole heartedly that spouses should live in the same state. My poor kids would tell you the same if they thought they had a vote. I really hate the economy!
thank you for the disclaimer just make sure that jace reads it while your away and that he knows the rules of the church and not the reorganized rules.
how do you do it? your so much nicer then i am and your kids are also a lot nicer then mine.
i sure hope you didn't get burned finally getting that fire started. if your the retarded pioneer then i am afraid i would qualify and the quadrapalegic pioneer. i would die for sure.
Okay I admit it... I stock your blog. Your hillarous! I LOVE reading your blog :) Thanks for a good laugh!
You are great! Remember last year when you had my husband for a long, long, time at your house for the winter?! Now, you know why I would call, crying! Hang in there.
I'm glad I don't have to worry about building fires.....sorry! If you need to talk call.
That is so hilarious. I am sad that you guys are not together...at least those times that you are they will be the best!!
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