Did it seem I was complaining (whining) in the last post? Can I explain?
My friend Jace Baum wants to feed me, clothe me, place a roof over my sorry head, love me, grope me, and most of all wants to see me HAPPY. He tries. Real hard. When the tears were falling in Utah last week and I was begging him to "just get in the car with me and come home with me.....We tried it. We saw it. Can we just call it a wash?" I could see it on his face and in his eyes. He thought about it. Long and hard. It kills him to see me sad. He would've got in the car. He would have put a stop to the tears right there.
Do you know what that tastes like? Guilt.
Do you know what the best find in Vernal, UT is that I forgot to mention? That I continually forget about? The paycheck. The one that will be deposited into my personal checking account tonight around 12:01 am. For heaven sakes. I think I'm going to survive my little transfer. Jace Baum has yet to drive my life into a ditch. I have had to reach over and grab the wheel a time or two (or three, or 37) but all in all we have been abundantly blessed. Hello, have you seen our kids? Oh, you forgot how sweet they are?
They don't come sweeter than this.
Well OK, maybe this one does.
Seriously? I know I will love Vernal. I will love Utah. I will love the people. I'm sure I'll even grow to love Jace in camo and the pink dinosaur greeting me on Main street. I will come to find why Heavenly Father opened this door, at this time, for us. The tears are not out of fear, anger, or desperation. The tears are for what I'm leaving behind. Life here was good. We have had a hell of a run here the White Mountains. We made some really good friends, memories, and choices. And I'm not planning on changing that......just location.
By the way, our new realtor called today. The homeowners accepted our offer. The offer is now on it's way to the bank. We hear banks are wanting to get rid of houses and bad debt lately. We shall see. We are one step closer to homeownership again. In Utah. My heart has been racing and my palms sweaty with excitement. My brain refuses to stop building porches, tearing down walls, picking out wall colors, adding trim, and planting grass.
What I'm getting at is....I'm really moving and I'm going to do with a smile on my face. Husbands and wives should live in the same state. Just know I'm going to miss you. Sisters. Parents. Wards. Taylor Elementary. Eva's. Blossom. Sonic. Friends. Mrs. Larson's Preschool. Bashas cub house. Aerobics. Pioneer Park. Neighbors. You know who you are.
12 comments:
I know everything is going to work out for you. We are all going to miss you too. Don't forget about Blossom when you come for a visit, or call and we can always send you something. Best of luck.
oh lindz,
i knew where your sadness came from. how would blame you for those tears?
how could you not be sad to leave the life behind that you have built with your family in taylor?
you will do great, your husband is so cool and not to mention will work to death for a pay check bless his heart, and your kids are so damn sweet. i want to squeeze ezra in that chair.
you all will do great and i can't wait for your new house. that for sure will keep you busy and the mind occupied, some of the best medicine around.
could you come to the valley one last time before you go?
You need no explanations. But what a good, nice, post. I loved it. I can't get it right in my mind with you leaving. It's always in the back of my mind, that maybe, just maybe Jace will come home at Christmas for good. What on earth am I going to do without you? Jordy always tells me I need to get out of my shell. The problem is that I really don't have much personality...It's kinda like being a friend with a stick in the mud. But you have always carried me along. Thanks for that. I hope I don't end up with my head back in the mud. You will always find someone else to befriend. What I lack in personality, you make up for and your stories, well they really are the best! You will have to get better about posting everyday. Love you.
Lindsay, I loved this post. You are so good about just up and moving. I would go kicking and screaming and I am not kidding. I am not good at making friends...I just love my sisters. You on the other hand are and you will do so well. We will miss you and those sweet kids and yes Jace and all his great stories and finds. What are our parties going to be like without the Baums...but it is exciting to get to redo a house...woohoo!
So sad..I can't handle it. I don't think that I could pick up right now and move, although I think it might of been last week that I told my sweetie, "do you ever just want to go somewhere new and start new"?? But what that really meant was just problems, I love everything else, I just want new problems I guess.?! Am I climbing up a ladder using steps? or am I trying to climb up chop sticks?...{You have to have steps to go up} That is just gravity I didn't even make that up;)
Don't worry I will come visit you and make things better for a few hours!!! I am glad you found a home!! I think that was a tough think to do alone in Vernal. When do you actualy move?
Hold up there sis! This is your current landlord speaking. What the HELL am I suppose to do now? Kidding Linds, but not really. Could you post on your blog I need renters, bad. or even better buyers. When can you move or when do you close? I am not one bit nervous for you. You have a town of mormons so you will get to know them, fast. And just keep blogging everyone loves your blog.
Welcome to Utah!
Trust me, it will be ok. It is a LONG drive across that reservation, with all the sheeps, and horses, and indians, and dirty bathrooms...we found that driving it at night is a lot easier on the eyes! :)
I'm sure your family and friends will miss you guys tons and the "mormony-mormons" of Utah will love you in your new ward. Just to warn you though- there are some weird ones.
Oh and maybe if your lucky you could sew yourself a camo "jumper" dress and wear it to church with your docs. I'm even betting that you could get your hair to do the "spikey" thing...I'm sure you could find someone there in that town to give you some fashion forward tips. (wink, wink!)
You have every right to complain and be sad! I know you will adjust and get use to the jacked up trucks and orange hats. I know you will be the most fashionable one around! We sure are going to miss you all like crazy! Keep your chin up......we love you all!
I just realized we drove through there on our way from Yellowstone one year. So, I'm now excited for you that you will live so close to Yellowstone and the Grand Tetons and Jackson Hole. I live near White Mountain Lake and Holbrook and Concho. OK I could mention some better places than that, but really would it matter? Come on, what we have here to compare to that? OK, maybe the Grand Canyon is pretty cool. But who goes there?
What a great post. (They always are)
Everyone understands your sadness, but we also understand that you and Jace do what you need to do. Can't blame you for that! You sure will be missed though! You'd just better keep the blog going, and be sure not to forget your friends with non-spikey hair!
Oh and I'm totally bummed because I was just assigned to be your VT and how much I would have loved chatting with you monthly! Oh well, maybe we can come for a first and last visit this month before you leave--do we have time?
Oh Lyndsay. You are going to be missed dearly. It's not as far as Kirst. Thats a good thing. Let us know if we can be of any help when you get ready to move.
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